myung can’t stand donggyu
hoya ize interview
Q. Is your injured leg okay?
Hoya: There’s a slight fracture in my bone and my muscle has been injured. KBS <Yoo Hee-yeol’s Sketchobook> recording was where I got hurt. The audience there is half males. The half that were females like us, but the male audience members were watching with their arms linked with girls as if to think, “Let’s see how good you are.” (laughs) So when we were on I wanted to perform as well that the guys would accept me. So I went overboard than usual. It’s all my fault.
Q. Is it important to be accepted by the guys?
Hoya: Whether it’s on the stage or anywhere else, being able to appeal to all genders is being really full of charms. I also watched those kind of singers and grew my dream thinking, “I want to be like that.” In grade one, the first singer I liked was Yoo Seungjun and in the first year of middle school I really liked Rain. After that, I also grew to like Usher and Justin Timberlake. It’s hard to express in words, but aren’t there some kind of aura to these people? Despite skills, I think only people who really have it have it (the aura). Even if I don’t listen to their stories, there’s something I can feel from their eyes.
Q. What do you need for that kind of charm?
Hoya: What’s really important is that you need a lot of experience. But even if you go on a ten day eleven nights trip, if you really want to build experiences, you can’t just go but also think about yourself and naturally feel something. You have to realize. So I also, even if it’s just reading books by myself I try to make it mine. Definitely now that I think about those kind of experiences there’s a lot more varieties of lyrics I can write. These days I’m working on Infinite H’s album, but if before I worried about what to write, now, there’s so many things. I almost have to worry about what I should leave out.
Q. This album, an Infinite H song “Alone” was added. How was the process of producing it?
Hoya: I’m personally close to the producer, Alphabat, Yooseok. So I worked comfortably. Even if it’s just a voice mail asking, how’s this, how’s that, we would exchange messages and call each other. My name is only credited for the rap making, but I didn’t just write the rap lyrics but also wrote the bridge part and the melody as well. We did change it to the melody that Yooseok wrote, though. The song concept was somebody who was getting tired of his girlfriend. Because I heard so many stories around me I had confidence that I could write about it. I also have something like that before. So I went back to the memories and wrote the lyrics.
Q. You must have gone more emotional than technical.
Hoya: I think I’m like that on stage, too. Before, I would always calculate where I should be more powerful, what kind of expressions I should do, and what kind of angle I should look at the three cameras in. Now, I just have go on stage with one emotion. Whether it’s dancing or singing, all the technical parts have been made in the practice room. Now rapping or acting, I’m getting used to all sorts of parts.
Q. What kind of person are you normally?
Hoya: I’m a person from the Gyeongsang district, so maybe it’s why, but before, even if I was sad I didn’t cry. I guess I thought that if I was a guy I couldn’t cry. But since two years ago, I put myself down a bit. There’s a lot of times that I cry a lot watching sad movies. I watch sad movies all night even when there’s nobody in the dorm. If there was a sad scene I’d just weep and cry. Then if somebody came in all of the sudden, I’d hurry and wipe my tears, hiding, not even saying hi.
Q. What did you think, seeing yourself change?
Hoya: I didn’t someone could change so easily. It’s fascinating that somebody’s personality can change too with a bit of work. I’m looking forward to see how I will change more, and I think I’m a bit more flexible. Before, I didn’t understand people who tried to solve things with human relations. I didn’t do a lot of that so I lost a lot from that. I then realized. I thought too innocently. I had a delusion that I could do everything myself. Skill is first. Just me, and the team needs to do well. Like that. But then our team might not look good if I thought like that, so then we might get less opportunities. From last year I thought I can’t live being hard like this. Up until three months ago I couldn’t understand celebrities doing business, but now it’s not even like that anymore.
Q. Why did you feel the need to even change your values?
Hoya: It’s not good to be stubborn about everything. Something that I’m sure about now may change to be nothing as time passes. Something that experience is really important is that when I got accepted to my company it was not because of dance but because of my singing. In that situation I really didn’t like it when my CEO told me to rap. But from the second album as I started to write rap lyrics myself, it was really fun. From then I started to be interested in rapping, and then I thought, “Ah, I want to sing, so can I be rapping right now?” Then after 1, 2 years, I realized that rap helps with singing as well. Because it’s all the same music. Even when I first started acting, I liked it but because my practice time for singing and dancing shrunk. I was worried that my skills would fall. But rather than practicing dancing and singing for 10 hours, practicing acting for 5 hours and practicing dancing and singing for 5 years, you get better at both. It’s synergy.
Q. Is there something you want to achieve by changing yourself?
Hoya: I don’t have a specific goal. When I’m most happy is not when I got first, or got any award, but when I’m just on stage. Even if I record myself practicing dancing then monitoring and I seemed to have improved, I’m the happiest. I want to feel that I’m developing.
Q. Aren’t you a bit impatient?
Hoya: If a chance just comes, I’m going to knock it all. There was a time I used to think like this. Now, rather than that I just try to enjoy myself. Then the results are better, too. Even if I can’t show you right now, if I work hard then I can keep on developing to show you a better side of myself. Hurrying doesn’t mean anything good. I don’t need to force opportunities.
© translation credit to ho-gyu | take out with full credit